Monthly Archives: October 2011

Dave Arcari Projects His Intense Wail Of Energy


On Tuesday 18th October The Colchester Arts Centre welcomed the critically acclaimed guitarist Dave Arcari. He entered the stage with just his guitar in hand, but when he started to play it became clear that he had brought much more than that. Arcari had brought a sound that wrapped blues, country and rock into an intense wail of energy. Steven Flavell reports.

Dave Arcari courtesy of Paul Webster

When the Scottish steel guitar player entered the stage I didn’t quite know what to expect. He seemed to possess a real presence that seemed almost unearthly. His thick beard glinted with silver and his eyes flashed with excitement, and then he started to play… He scrunched his face into the glare of a madman that had stumbled upon a secret. When Arcari played Devil’s Left Hand it all became clear, the lyrics revealed the secret that his expression alluded to; “the devil’s left hand reached across the sticks, and I drank all his whiskey and learnt some of his tricks.”

His performance of Parcel Of Rogues was mesmerising and strangely disorientating. Like a mischievous dancer of deliverance Arcari galloped across the stage, glaring out of focus but very much in tune. He swung his beard away from his body to break free but it clung to him like his guitar.

During Got Me Electric Arcari strummed a bassy percussion into his guitar that he saluted with a roll back of his eyes and the raspy twang of his voice. He stomped his feet as he gazed out with glee, wrapping his rich scotch accent around the lyrics, strangling them with rugged emotion. As I watched him I wondered if this was a madman or a genius, but perhaps he is both…

This article was originally posted by me on the Colchester Circle blog.

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Hokie Joint Turn The Soundhouse Into A Juke Joint


On Friday 7th October Hokie Joint turned The Soundhouse at The Bull into a juke joint; or at the very least gave it the feel of one with their raw and dirty version of roots based blues. Steven Flavell reports.

This is a band that plays music together, not as petty individuals seeking to steal the limelight from one another by over exaggerating their own prowess. They share the moment together and build it up into a deep breath of quirky and original roots music. Their aim is to take the blues to the masses.

Hokie Joint

JoJo Burgess (image courtesy of Brian Sherwen)
It was very difficult not to focus on the antics of Jo Jo Burgess the lead singer who brought an almost vaudevillian presence to the band in between songs; he communicated with the crowd in an Ian Dury-esque manner awkwardly flexing his limbs and blazing his eyes wide open like a man possessed.

Stephen Cutmore the drummer (courtesy of Brian Sherwen)

Meanwhile their drummer; Stephen Cutmore reminds me of Mick Jagger, partly because he looks like him, and partly because he spends the whole time pulling faces like him! He looks like a man who’s having a brilliant time on stage, providing energy and genuine personality. It really rubs off on the audience.

Joel Fisk the guitarist (courtesy of Tony Joe Gardner)

Joel Fisk brings startlingly skilful slide guitar to the fore. He is a fairly shy personality in comparison to some members of the band on stage, but there is nothing understated about his play; he slides into solos that echo the likes of Eric Clapton.

Giles King harmonica with Fergie Fulton base (courtesy of Brian Sherwen)

When I heard that Giles King was regarded as one of the best blues harmonica players in the country I took it with a pinch of salt. However when I heard him play it all became clear. I have absolutely no idea how to play the harmonica but I do know that Giles King can do some pretty special things with one. During their song Back Where We Are Going he even left the stage and entered into the midst of the crowd while performing a solo.

Fergie Fulton brings energetic base lines that complement the eye-catching antics and sounds of Hokie Joint’s electric guitar and harmonica. For a bassist he displays a relatively rare willingness to get right up at the front of the stage and bust out his bass for all to see. Yup, Hokie Joint were keen to share the love around, and you know what? I think I felt it.

What I really like about Hokie Joint was that they didn’t rely on padding out their set with other people’s songs’, but stuck to their own music. The Music Starts To Play (the title track of their second album) began with a mischievous exchange between the guitar and drums before being joined by the harmonica, bass and vocals. It created an energy that seemed to grow with every breath that was sucked in and blown out by Giles King’s harmonica.

Apologise was another track that oozed energy. Stehen Cutmore wound up the drums with his careful brushwork while he pouted his lips like a madman, Fergie Fulton joined in with a thick base line before the guitar, vocals and harmonica united to create a petulant defiance; to quote the song lyrics “It’s not a problem, why should I apologise.”

The Crying Song was much slower and it began with Joel Fisk playing a clean and clear riff to amplify the vocals of Jo Jo Burgess which sounded incredible. Jo Jo rasped “How I cried, how I cried” like a rusty chainsaw that cut through the sounds of the instruments and into your flesh… in a good way!

I had not seen Hokie Joint before, but I will make sure I see them again.

Hokie Joint will play at the Colchester Arts Centre on Tuesday 18th October. Click here to book tickets.

This article was originally posted by me on the Colchester Circle blog

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The Full Phat 5 Lay Down The Funk-Bomb At Roberts


On Saturday 1st October The Full Phat 5 played at Roberts Live Lounge in Colchester and left the audience suitably funkified. The Full Phat 5 produced a performance of genuine passion and energy that showed how to cover some of the best soul and funk tracks ever made. Steven Flavell was there to enjoy the experience.

The Full Phat 5

When I heard that The Full Phat 5 were playing at Roberts bar I just had to go. Although I had never seen them play before, I have seen Greg Blackman perform with his piano; his voice is something that really has to be sampled in person; it’s just made for soul and funk. However The Full Phat 5 are not just a one man band, far from it. The remaining four members: Matt Haines (guitar), Rocky Hambling (drums), Geoff Hall (bass) and Kev Wiltshire (keyboard) possess years of experience from gigging and touring across the country and Europe.

How this band came to be is not important, what is important is that we have a local soul and funk cover band that can lay down a set that covers songs by the likes of Stevie Wonder to Bill Withers.

The Full Phat 5 opened with a full and rich rendition of I Wish by Stevie Wonder and followed it up with Harvest For The World by The Isley Brothers. The band seemed at ease as the lethargic base and smooth keys appeared to carry you away with the peaceful melodies of the song.

It was at this moment that The Full Phat 5 introduced a little funk to the proceedings by playing Brick House by The Commodores. The mischievous rhythm of the song is impossible not to dance to. When I looked onto the dance floor I thought that The Full Phat 5 had succeeded in bringing back to life the late Patrick Swayze; he was dancing away like nobody’s business, but alas it was not Patrick Swayze. It was merely a drunken lookalike who couldn’t dance at all…

One of the highlights of the night was during the Bill Withers song Ain’t No Sunshine in the third verse where Bill Withers repeats “I know, I know, I know…” and builds his voice with emotion and volume. Vocally it is incredibly difficult to replicate but Greg Blackman filled the lyrics with such soulful passion that it sent a shiver down my spine.

The Full Phat 5

The Full Phat 5’s cover of Al Green’s Lets Stay Together was also a very special moment. The band nailed it. The gentle thud of the drums complemented the mysterious keys to create a soothing lullaby. Click here to listen to The Full Phat 5′s recorded version of Lets Stay Together by Al Green.

The Full Phat 5 ended the night with Sir Duke by Stevie Wonder, whereby they well and truly laid down the funk like an atom bomb. It was delivered with explosive emotion and it was a great way to end the night.

This article was originally posted by me on the Colchester Circle blog

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Cage Fitness: A New Way To Get Fighting Fit

For most people who want to get fit and shed a few pounds, their first thought is to sign up for an expensive and long term gym membership. Most people certainly wouldn’t consider going to a cage fitness session. However this new concept is slowly becoming more popular. Steven Flavell endured an intense thirty minute workout at Colchester Wado Ryu Karate club and he did it in the name of journalism! The fool…

One thing we can all agree on is the importance of maintaining a healthy lifestyle in terms of diet and regular exercise.

Cage Fitness uses a punch bag rather than a partner to avoid the risk of injuries

However it’s one thing being aware of it and another actually doing it. It seems that for every person that joins a gym, there is another person who quickly grows bored of the whole experience. One problem can be the expensive subscription for a gym membership, or even the intimidating narcissism that accompanies the many mirrors for people to watch themselves while they pump weights. So what can people do to get fit and keep exercising? Believe it or not, one possibility is cage fitness.

The Colchester Wado Ryu Karate club have introduced cage fitness sessions for people to get fit and hopefully have a little fun in the process. According to Darren Reynolds, the sensei and owner “it offers an opportunity for people of all fitness levels to exercise effectively. Each person can put in what they want to get out of it. It’s not important whether someone works harder than another person; it’s about improving your own fitness levels and enjoying the experience.”

I attended one of the sessions last week and can say that it’s definitely a more interesting experience than going to the gym. It is however very hard work! It’s a thirty minute workout, which revolves around the same training regime that mixed martial artists use such as the fighters that appear in cage fights. The workout is based on a championship bout of five five-minute rounds. Each round works a different part of your body.

Some people reading this may be worried that it may be too physical. I put this to Darren who dispelled this myth; “It’s not like karate in the respect that you don’t have a partner to do the exercises with. You use a kick bag instead so there is no risk of injury to yourself or another person. It’s a very safe activity.”

Darren Reynolds is the sensei and owner of Colchester Wado Ryu Karate club

Darren also believes that “cage fitness can offer varied forms of exercise every single session. Although you are not working with a partner there are other people in the room performing the same exercises, so it can become a mini-competition if you are watching someone else and trying to keep up with them; so it is easy to stay motivated during each session.

“The feedback that I’ve had from people is that it’s not as boring. For a lot of people who go down the gym it can become a bit of a novelty. They may stick with it for three to four months but eventually they get bored of it because it can become a repetition of the same exercises and experiences, whereas cage fitness can progress and change. We already offer a variation of different exercises and drills, but we hope to introduce maybe 10-15 more variations of this to keep the experience interesting and varied for those who participate.”

Although The Colchester Wado Ryu Karate club primarily offers Martial Arts classes, Darren Reynolds explained why they decided to introduce cage fitness sessions.
“It was something I thought would be a good idea to introduce into the Dojo as an extra non-martial arts related exercise where people can come and join in who have no karate experience; meanwhile existing karate students can participate and improve their fitness levels alongside their training.”

If you are interested in giving cage fitness sessions a go or even trying a karate class, click on the Colchester Wado Ryu Karate website. The first class is completely free.

This article was originally posted by me for the Colchester Circle.

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The Colchester Circle: Work Experience

I am terribly sorry for the dormancy of my blog in recent times, but I’ve been rather busy…As some of you may or may not be aware, I have been working at the Colchester Circle as part of a four week internship. The opening two weeks have been a wonderful learning experience for me. I’ve not only been able to gather a better idea of how the publishing industry works, but I have also had the opportunity to write a number of articles on the Colchester Circle blog.

In the last two weeks I have had the opportunity to observe and help-out on a fashion-photo shoot, interview a number of people such as Joel Fisk; the guitarist of Hokie Joint, and even write a number of articles to go on the Colchester Circle blog and in their upcoming November issue.

You can find a list of all the articles that I have written for the Colchester Circle by clicking on my name (Steven Flavell) on their blog. These articles are written on topics ranging from music reviews of The Full Phat 5, to fitness & health articles on cage fitness.

I will try to keep you updated with my latest articles for the Colchester Circle, and even write something for the indecisionsandmisgivings blog. Only two more weeks to go!

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London Blowout

It starts off as a side thought, but it grows. You think about it a little, maybe even try to rationalise it. You say to yourself “why shouldn’t I go? It’s not like I’ve got anything better to do.” You think about it more and more until it becomes an idea. Pretty soon you’ve already enlisted recruits to help you formulate a suitable plan to do it justice. Before you know it you have a trip planned for London. That’s how it happened, my friend Dan and I made plans to head up to the big city and meet his sister and her boyfriend at their place.

Now those of you who have read my blog before will be aware of my sympathies for the plight of the unoccupied. It’s a matter of finding things to do. Well, when you have a big weekend in London lined up the anticipation becomes too much to bear. In my head at the time, this wasn’t just a weekend away in the big city, oh no! It was to be a symbolic night that would give meaning to all those involved. It would be a blowout, a London blowout.

The Journey

The weekend began like any other involving my friend Dan and me; with me affectionately suckling from the teat of dependence that he courteously provided, as he always does. His car was the vehicle that would carry me all the way to London in a nonchalant haze of relaxing bliss.

To some people not having a car would appear to be an inconvenience, and at times I sympathise with this viewpoint (After all the limitations of a slow and cumbersome bus route become all too clear when the pelting rain accompanies the harsh whistling winter winds.) However when you have a friend, a good friend, who also doubles up as a wonderful transportation unit you may well forget about these past inconveniences. In fact while I sat with my legs proudly stretched out before me with Dan toiling over the wheel frantically negotiating his way through the traffic of London towards our destination life seemed rather good. I may not have a car but I do have a full driving licence. God knows if I can still remember to drive, but at least I have Dan, he can drive for me. Sitting there in the passenger seat I may not have been considered to be in a powerful position in the traditional sense, the driving seat, but in a way it was I who was happy.

The arrival

Eventually we arrived at Chris and Lucinda’s place in London. Lucinda is Dan’s sister, and Chris her boyfriend. Their ‘place’ was somewhere in the docklands area. After several hours of intensive driving we were ready to let our hair down and get the party started. Dan was particularly looking forward to having a drink, I specifically remember him saying “I can’t wait to have a drink when we get there.” It wasn’t just Dan who had a drink though, we all did but not before we completed our greetings. Chris had thoughtfully purchased a chilled pack of ciders in preparation for our arrival. Being the polite guest I proceeded to drink the ciders, not excessively, only a few in fact. Nonetheless the expectation of a ‘good night’ was beginning to bubble over nicely.

I remember once Dan told me of Chris’s impression of me when we first met. Apparently he believed I was either capable of great things or collapsing into an anxious heap on the ground. I liked that idea, not particularly the breakdown part but the idea that as human beings our fortunes can and will swing either way, it’s up to us to decide which way. Looking back now I see it as an incentive, something to drive me on and make sure I do go on to achieve ‘great things’ whatever they may be. But back then when we were preparing for our night out in London I rolled the dice, I downed a few ciders in double quick time and prayed that that adorable pink elephant would deliver me and the others towards a splendid evening.

Vomiting into one’s lap

In hindsight my ability to influence the decision making process was insignificant, any man who tells you he wanted to vomit on his black skinny jeans in the back of a taxi is a liar. But at the time I was drunk, and thereby delusional, the reality of the situation was conveniently tinted by that charming pink elephant. The bastard… As I let the sick slowly dribble out of my drooping head all over my lap I did not feel like a man who was lost. I felt how the liberal democrats must have felt when they got into bed with the conservatives and joined them in coalition. By being as discreet as possible and compromising on HOW I was sick, I spared my friends the shame of being evicted from the vehicle of an angry taxi driver. I might have been drunk, I might have been deluded, my jeans may have been covered in sick but at least we got home! Had I vomited out of the window instead, it would have been my friends that ultimately suffered the consequences of my actions and not my clothing. I was trying to make the best out of a bad situation.

Like I said, perhaps this was how the liberal democrats felt when they joined the tories in holy matrimony, old Cleggy probably said “we might have compromised our principles, our sense of being, but the public would have suffered more from a hung parliament and the need for another blasted election!”

In hindsight, regardless of whatever drunken philosophy I used at the time to justify my act, whether it be pragmatically seeking to make good out of the bad like Willie Stark from ‘All the Kings Men’, it was I who vomited on his own clothes and smelt of sick at the end of the night.

Waking up in Dan’s arms

I woke up to a surprise. Waking up with a splitting headache was not the surprise; that was to be expected, collateral damage exchanged for the excesses of the night before. The ‘surprise’ was waking up in the arms of my friend Dan in a bed that I have no recollection of getting into. Even more of a surprise was that the only clothing that we were wearing was underwear… Well, it’s not that I don’t trust the man; he’s a lovely bloke, one of my best friends in fact. But when one wakes up in the arms of his six foot five friend; who is incidentally massive (not fat but big) one cannot help but question the series of happenings that must have led you there. Dan is not a rapist, I would happily testify to that in a court of law. Furthermore our friendship is purely platonic; we both have girlfriends for Christ sake! However when you wake up in your mate’s arms you fear the worst… What If he in a sort of dream-like state mistook me for his girlfriend, well how on earth would I fight him off, answer me that!?

However contrary to what might have been it appears that we did not make sweet love that night, we merely shared a bed, a double bed. When Dan woke up he said he felt a hand on his chest, he wondered if he had got lucky. Well you can imagine his sense of disappointment when he looked over and saw a man with a beard. We got up an assured ourselves that nothing out of the ordinary had occurred. We left the house for London bridge to explore the surrounding area, we were however very hung-over.

London bridge

As I stood in the queue outside London Bridge I saw a man walk out from a posh restaurant and carefully take out a slice of bread from a bag, I probably saw the sad reality of poverty stricken Britain. I probably saw a tragic example of how the rich reject the poor and show them the door refusing them a place to dine at the privileged table of society. But I was horribly hung-over…

It may have been the splitting headache but maybe just maybe it wasn’t, perhaps it was the morbid romantic in me that allowed mysel for a moment to muse this thought. Watching that man outside that restaurant eating that slice of bread, I chose to believe in a different scenario, the man was not eating the bread out of necessity but because of an elaborate alternative. I imagined that the man was on a date with a woman, and he had allowed her to order whatever she desired, he probably wanted to impress her. While she ordered a hearty meal he ordered a cheap salad and drank water. Half way through the date, proceedings were going well. But then things started to turn, his stomach began to rumble as he watched his date tuck into her meal, his salad certainly wasn’t doing the job so he made his excuses and left for the toilet. On his way he snuck outside the entrance whereby he ravenously devoured slice after slice of bread. He wasn’t eating the bread out of hunger, but for love! Well it may not have been true, but at the time, it seemed plausible, and perhaps that was enough.

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The Importance Of Writing A Covering Letter

As we all know, times are hard; economically, socially, philosophically and god knows what else…In these testing times of economic uncertainty getting your foot in the door for that first job can be challenging to say the least. On the internet there are a wealth of sites that provide useful hints and tips on how to secure employment. It all boils down to being proactive and matching your own set of skills with that of the employers’ specification. Candidates must learn to “sell themselves” to the employer, do what you have to! Sell your soul if you have to but for christ sake don’t sell yourself short! Writing a covering letter is your opportunity to make an impression on the employer and land an interview, maybe even a job… below is an example of the ideal covering letter.  

Dear Sirs,

I would like to apply for the position of “Useless Twit” as advertised on the moronic website for morons. Please find my CV attached.

As you can see from my CV I am a recent graduate from the University of Indecision where I achieved a 2:1 in Hypochondria and Anxiety (a four year sandwich course for the foolish). My academic misgivings make me a Twit of the highest order. My dissertation on the importance of Pop Culture where I analysed several magazines that should be burned rather than read prove my uselessness. My dissertation was awarded a distinction for its particularly shambolic style and inconclusions.

I am particularly attracted to the role with regards to ‘plundering all situations of their dignity until all the persons involved are left in utter disgrace’. Although I have no formal work experience in this field may I draw your attention to my criminal record whereby I have been charged with several counts of public indecency. Once in a supermarket I proposed to a salmon at the fish counter only to be advised by an employee that the salmon was in fact dead. He advised me that I may purchase the salmon if I wished. Naturally I refused advising him that I do not pay for it.

Thank you for taking the time to consider my application. I hope that I will hear from you soon.

Yours insincerely

Fyodor Cretinman.
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Liverpool Machine Geared Towards Top Four Finish

Liverpool fans have a genuine cause for optimism. The summer spending spree during the summer has combined with the Dalglish factor to leave Liverpool fans salivating at the prospect of a top four finish. Four points from a possible six from their opening two games of the season including an impressive 2-0 victory over Arsenal in their own backyard adds credence to the belief that Liverpool will be a powerful force this season, particularly when their new signings find their feet.

When the Liverpool spending spree surpassed the £50 million mark some pundits questioned whether Dalglish and the Liverpool owners had frivolously wasted their money. The £16 million pound outlay for the promising talent of Jordan Henderson in particular raised a few eyebrows. After all despite the Sunderland youngsters’ impressive start to the first half of last season his form tailed off quite significantly. Nonetheless Henderson’s talent is undeniable, he may not be worth his transfer fee just yet, but he will surely grow and improve as a player each year to become an impressive England international.

Meanwhile the rest of the summer dealings conducted by Liverpool appear to be shrewd business. The arrivals of Jose Enrique and Charlie Adam for a combined fee of £14 million provide excellent value. Liverpool has added to its squad a genuine playmaker in Adam who possesses a magic wand of a left foot. Meanwhile the muscular figure of Enrique already seems to have stamped his authority on the previously problematic left back position.

Although the £20 million paid for Stewart Downing appears expensive at first glance perhaps a closer look at Downing’s qualities might ease the concerns of some Liverpool fans? At 27 years of age Stewart Downing is an established England international whose pace and guile make him a dangerous winger, particularly when you consider the quality of his deliveries that he will surely provide from out wide for the gigantic Andy Carroll.
From the left: Jordan Henderson, Charlie Adam, Kenny Dalglish,  Alexander Doni and Stewart Downing.

Sourced from: footballatliverpool.com

These signings have only added to the wave of optimism that has swept through Anfield since the return of King Kenny as manager. Kenny Dalglish’s return saw Liverpool’s results dramatically improve last season; under Dalglish Liverpool climbed from the bottom half of the table all the way up to sixth place. By the end of the season the Dalglish factor had began to fuel hope and expectation to the extent that some fans even dreamed of challenging for the title in the following season.

However the strength and depth of the Manchester clubs and expected cash injection into Chelsea make a potential title challenge for Liverpool seem like a step too far this season. Nonethless the new signings during the summer appear to have added strength and depth to a Liverpool squad who already have the likes of Steven Gerrard and Luis Suarez. Thus Liverpool fans believe that they have a genuine chance of re-establishing themselves as a top four club this season.

Liverpool’s improvements on paper during the summer may have reignited the burning fire of expectation amongst fans; however Liverpool’s promising start to the 2011/12 campaign will surely stoke such expectation even further. Four points from a possible six including a 2-0 away victory at the Emirates against Arsenal make for impressive reading. Dalglish will clearly have to work hard with his squad to integrate his new players and create a fluid first team that can realise its potential. This may take at least ten games as demonstrated by the disappointing second half display against Sunderland on the opening day of the season. However the victory on Saturday against Arsenal was recorded with a ruthless efficiency that will get Liverpool fans dreaming again. The squad looks strong, particularly when Dalglish has the luxury of bringing on Raul Meireles and Suarez with twenty minutes to go in a game. Liverpool now seems to have the necessary mix of steel and fire-power to rack up points and victories on a consistent basis.

This Liverpool side is certainly not ready to push for the title, the new signings need time to find their feet and build a greater understanding with the rest of the first team. However one gets the impression that when the cogs of this Liverpool machine have been oiled and it starts to work its way up through the gears Liverpool will have a fantastic chance of beating Arsenal and Spurs to that crucial champion’s league place. It’s by no means a guarantee, but there is certainly enough promise to fill this Liverpool fan with optimism.
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The Unemployed

For the unemployed person the most trivial events and items begin to carry with them a heavy burden of expectation. Principally they offer relief from the daily troubles of unemployed life. Now those of you reading this who have a job, or indeed anything to do from day to day may well think “you what?! Do me a favour!?”

Perhaps it would be wise of me to dispel a few myths about the unemployed… Although the unemployed rarely have any pressing matters to deal with or even any actual occupational hazards to negotiate; the life of the unoccupied can be like a virtual prison cell. Despite the lack of concrete walls or clichéd steel bars to keep the unoccupied incarcerated, there exists a very real sense of imprisonment.

Thus a rather bizarre situation develops where the particularly conscientious (Anxious/hypochondriac) unemployed person can find himself feeling rather trapped. In being free to do almost anything with his time, the unemployed person may “choose” to worry about not doing anything. As the months pass and the seasons change, the stale rot of unemployment remains and festers. The unemployed asks himself “what am I to do if not work?”

Consequently the unemployed person attempts to fill his life with the most mundane trivial items read from a bafflingly blank agenda to avoid dealing with the crux of the matter. The crux of the matter being that we are procrastinating, we are ignoring the real issue, in fact we probably aren’t even aware of the reality we live in. Perhaps the clever bastards who have read Karl Marx may think that we are alluding to a slightly wider issue such as capitalist society causing man’s alienation from his true self? To that I say “please sirs, I am but a poor humble unemployed person, and although I may well have read Marx before, I cannot rightly remember on account of being unemployed for so very long (one month four days thirteen minutes).

The above cartoon is sourced from http://www.the405club.com/post/235966518/best-unemployment-comics

Anyway… the interminable stay of execution of the unemployed can seem long. So as I was saying, it can be wise to fill the time with “exciting” and “meaningful” activities such as waking up just in time for the 11am instalment of “Made in Chelsea”. Programmes such as this begin to carry  an unspeakable significance. There significance can be measured by the following irrefutable fact: far far away hidden behind immovable mountains, thoughtful monks utter words such as this “Ollie is bisexual…”

Of Course it’s all bollocks, to tell you the truth I just got carried away, “Made in Chelsea” doesn’t mean a thing. But my delusions make me happy; it can be fun to be tricked by the illusion of consumerist culture. After all it gives me something to do, a sense of being occupied for the unoccupied.
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